If you’ve ever rushed from a parent’s doctor appointment to your child’s school event, you’re not alone. Millions of adults are caught in the middle—caring for aging parents while still supporting their own children. It’s a role filled with love and purpose, but it also comes with exhaustion, financial strain, and endless to-do lists. This growing group, known as the “sandwich generation,” is learning that balance isn’t just about time management; it’s about preparation, communication, and having the right legal and financial support in place.
How Common Is the Sandwich Generation?
According to the Pew Research Center, about 23% of U.S. adults now have a parent age 65 or older while also raising a child or supporting an adult child financially. Among those in their 40s, more than half (54%) fall into this group.
The World Economic Forum notes that this population is growing quickly as people live longer and adult children rely on family support longer than before. This shift means millions of families are caught between the needs of two generations at once: aging parents who require care and children who still need financial or emotional support.
Understanding the Pressures You May Face
Emotional and Time Strain
Supporting both parents and children requires constant energy and attention, which can quickly wear you down. Many in the sandwich generation spend hours each week coordinating medical care, managing bills, and providing transportation, all while maintaining a household and career. Without support, burnout can happen quickly.
To prevent this:
- Prioritize time for yourself, even small breaks during the week.
- Share responsibilities with siblings or trusted relatives.
- Accept help when it’s offered, even if others don’t do things exactly the way you would.
Financial Challenges
Balancing college tuition for your children while covering medical or caregiving expenses for parents can stretch any budget. Caregivers often reduce work hours, use personal savings, or delay their own retirement to help family members.
Practical steps include:
- Setting clear limits on how much financial support you can provide.
- Tracking out-of-pocket caregiving expenses.
- Consulting a financial advisor or attorney about long-term planning strategies.
Legal Planning: Protecting Everyone You Care For
One of the most effective ways to protect your family, both older and younger generations, is through proper legal planning. An elder law and estate planning attorney can ensure your parent has the right documents in place and that your own estate plan aligns with theirs.
Key documents for aging parents include:
- Health Care Proxy – Allows you to make medical decisions if your parent becomes incapacitated.
- Durable Power of Attorney – Lets you handle financial and legal matters on your parent’s behalf.
- HIPAA Release – Grants access to your parent’s medical information and allows communication with their healthcare providers.
- Advance Directive / Living Will – Though not legally binding in Massachusetts, it outlines your parent’s wishes for medical treatment and end-of-life care.
- Last Will and Testament – Clarifies how assets should be distributed and prevents confusion after death.
Beyond these basics, an attorney can help establish trusts to protect assets, minimize taxes, and plan for long-term care costs. These steps can prevent avoidable financial hardship and reduce family conflict later.
Practical Care Options to Lighten the Load
If you’re struggling to balance care between generations, you don’t have to do it alone. Options worth exploring include:
- Home Care Services: Provide help with daily activities, meal preparation, and transportation.
- Adult Day Health Programs: Offer socialization, supervision, and meals for seniors during the day.
- Respite Care: Short-term stays in assisted living communities that give caregivers time to rest or travel.
These services can relieve pressure and give you space to focus on your own family, work, and health.
How We Support the Sandwich Generation
At Surprenant, Beneski & Nunes, P.C., we understand the legal and personal challenges faced by Massachusetts families in the sandwich generation.
We help clients:
- Draft and update vital estate planning documents.
- Protect assets through tailored trusts and long-term care planning.
- Coordinate plans for parents and adult children, including preparing caregiver contracts to clarify responsibilities and support financial continuity.
Working with an experienced team means you can focus more on your loved ones and less on the paperwork and stress that come with caregiving.
Moving Forward with Support
Being part of the sandwich generation is demanding, but you can get support. The attorneys at Surprenant, Beneski & Nunes, P.C. will help you put the right legal framework in place so you can focus on what matters most: your family.
Contact us today to schedule a consultation and learn how we can help you plan for your loved ones’ care, protect your assets, and bring balance back to your life.
